The Overly Peppy Confident Me...

I say and think a lot of the affirmation in this video now and they have made such a huge difference in my life and in who I am.

I've been sick for a while now fighting this sinus infection/cold/whatevertheheckitis. Because I am still working on the promotion at work, I have mainly been working and sleeping to keep myself going so I don't miss any time at work. Still not feeling perfect but I am feeling better so here I am.

We find out tomorrow just what the next interview will consist of. Apparently it is going to be quite different than just a regular sit down interview and can take a little over a week. Don't really know much at all yet but it sounds like it is going to be fun and so very interesting.

I have talked to Ken, the Operations Manager that will be doing the next interview, several times lately and have been thoroughly amazed with myself. Every time I talk to him lately, I have to stop and think back to the person that I was just a mere two months ago.

Who I was then and who I am now are two so very different people. I was depressed, quiet, moody, almost always had my eyes cast downward. I never would have considered applying for the position even at that time and certainly would not have talked so openly and confidently with Ken, or anyone else for that matter, like I do now.

Now, I am happy, confident, keep my eyes up, smile, laugh, and feel awesome about myself and my life. My son is always telling me I am being too loud now and that I should act my age.(apparently "old" people aren't supposed to have fun) One night after work I stopped at Subway to get the kids and I some dinner and as I am standing there I am moving all around and humming to myself and smiling all over. It occurred to me that I had become one of those overly peppy people that used to piss me off!  I love it!

I love who I have become and who I am becoming. Changing how I think and how I look at things and react to things has changed my life so much. I love where my life is going and I have the confidence in myself to be able to handle every happy and wonderful step!

I'm worth it!

I had such a superiffic, fantabulous, ridiculously amazing day today!!!

Today started the first round of interviews for the Coach’s Apprentice positions at work. I was super excited and super terrified all at the same time. But I was ready!

Last night I made myself a set of note cards to use as cue cards at the interview. My Coach, Kassie, had given those of us on her team that applied a list of some questions to expect at the interview. I had put each question on a note card and then jotted notes for each one for my answer (I had answered each one fully on a piece of paper prior). I also had cards for different areas of the position that I feel I qualify for and had noted under each one what prior job or experience I had acquired that skill from. I was ready….but very nervous.

I was off chats early enough before my interview that I was able to get a mini pep talk through texts from a very dear friend and words of encouragement from a couple of other dear friends. Their words of encouragement and support helped me calm down enough that Erin, the interviewer, didn’t even notice I was nervous.  Woohoo!

I know I can be an awesome coach. With all the positive changes I have been making in myself and my life, my determination and motivation, my enthusiasm and awesome confidence….how can I not be?

I have a Facebook page and a Facebook group both called Awakening to Life. I post my blog entries, daily positive affirmation, my daily MITs (most important tasks), and many other positive and uplifting things to both the page and the group. Those in the group are absolutely wonderful and I love them all to pieces (sends each of them a huge bear hug). They are so supportive of each other that it makes me so incredibly proud of each of them when I go to the group and read what has been going on. When I have a down day, I know they are there to help me lift myself back up. It is my goal to have a team that can be as supportive and encouraging as the wonderful people in my group.

So anyway, after the interview went so incredibly well I felt just so super great! On my drive home I started thinking about who I was and where I was in my life just a couple of months ago. In December, I was a depressed, quiet and miserable no one. Now, here I am!  Look at me world!  I am happy! I am confident! I am loving who I am and where my life is and where it is heading! My outgoingness (which I have NEVER had before) now embarrasses my 17 year old son!  Yay me!!! 

As I was reflecting on all of the wonderful changes I have made in myself and my life just in the past two months, it hit me that even if I don’t get the CA job, I have so much more to be proud of myself for in just the last two months than most people have in a lifetime. I am finally being the me that I have always known I could be but was just too damn afraid and depressed to be. I am finally enjoying life and enjoying it more and more every day. Things that used to irritate me and get me mad….I laugh at and just move on.  I have taken so many huge steps lately and have come out a better person because of it. I love who I am and who I will be and I have never been able to say that before!

I took my parents and my kids out to dinner tonight to celebrate!!!

Positive Changes

I have so many wonderful things going on in my life right now. It is just so super exciting for me to see such awesome changes in myself and my life by actively changing my own thoughts and words.

First thing that I have going on that is a very huge step for me is that I have applied for a Coach’s Apprentice position at work. This leads to being a Coach of my own team as well. I never would have even considered applying for this position a month ago. I have the confidence in myself and my abilities to be a great coach. I love my job. I love going to work and hate when I get sick and have to miss.

I hear so many people at work complaining and they are always counting down the hours til it is time to leave. I would love to be able to help other people love their work as much as I do and to help them discover and develop their full potential. With all the positive change I am making in my life I know I can get people motivated and help them stay motivated. I know I can do this and I am so excited that I have this opportunity.

Over the past few weeks one thing has been a constant source of dread and stress in my life….my schoolwork. One thing I am realizing as I keep making changes to myself and being more positive is that the things I strive for and find important are also changing. After much thought and soul-searching I decided to put my schooling on hold for a while. Right now improving myself and my life, taking care of my home and family, and doing my absolute best at work are the most important things. School can wait.

I am loving myself and my life more and more with each passing day. I continue to learn more about myself and how to be a better me. I love me! I love my life! I love my kids! I love my job! I love everything and everyone!

Now it is time for me to do some preparing for the interview for the position at work. I currently don’t know exactly when the interview is but it is soon. I am going to be prepared for it. I can do this! I need to convince Ken that I can as well.

Quotes:

You can change your world by changing your words... Remember, death and life are in the power of the tongue.
Joel Osteen

Choosing to bepositiveand having a grateful attitude is going to determine how you're going to live your life.
Joel Osteen

If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude.
Maya Angelou

Celebrating each moment

It truly is amazing just  how much my thinking can change how my life goes. I have been working very hard at keeping positive and encouraging thoughts in my head and heart lately. I do have times when that stinkin' thinkin' creeps back in. I don't let it stay long and I don't beat myself up for letting it in. As long as I can kick it to the curb, all is great!

I am having days where I feel like I could just fly to the stars because I feel so awesome. This is very unusual for me as I used to be the one that was always down and felt like crying. No more! Those are the days I am putting behind me. I know one of those days will creep in (one did on Sunday) but I will kick it aside and keep on moving.

I am going to celebrate every moment of my day with my happy positive thoughts! No more grey skies for me....just more and more rays of sun!

Emotional Dependence

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about some things lately and one thing that keep popping up is emotional dependence. I am so much aware that I am doing this lately and am trying to stop it. I do not need to depend on someone else to life my spirits or make me happy. No one can make me happy. If I am happy when talking to them or spending time with them it is because I have chosen to enjoy their company. By realizing that I am making that choice makes it easier to find enjoyment doing things by myself. It opens up so many possibilities to me to create my own happiness. Now instead of saying “You make me feel good.” I can smile and say, “I enjoy having you in my life”.

As with anything that has been a habit for so long, this will take time to fully overcome. The first step is that I am aware that I do it. The rest is easy.

Positive Affirmation for January 23, 2012

Growing and changing is fun. I enjoy the process.

My three MITs (most important tasks) for January 23, 2012

1. reflect on some things that I have been doing

2. schoolwork

3. work at least 15 minutes in my room

Quotes:

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. ~Eleanor Roosevelt

That was stinkin' thinkin'

I am long overdue for this blog entry and I do apologize for anyone that has been waiting. Depression and stinkin’ thinkin’ grabbed hold of me and held on tight. I am still working on throwing the little bugger off me but he is still lingering. I know that during the times I am depressed it is probably even more important for me to be posting than even the good time. Posting the bad will help me reflect on the bad things to see what changes I can make and posting the good will help me remember that I can get through the rough spots and make the changes that I need.

I had some people express that they would like some background information about David and my past in general. I have been considering this during the much too long “break” in my posts. I can understand how know something may be helpful to the reader; however, the purpose of making these changes is to move forward, not to look back. With this in mind, what I will do is reflect on the past when it is needed and appropriate but won’t give a huge past background post. This way the reader gets the background information as it is needed and I only have to relive it in small doses.

I am not going to try to recap the past several days as I don’t even remember most of it anyway. I have been stressed and depressed for many reasons…home, work, school, relationships, etc. My mind and my heart have been all over the place like a roller coaster being tossed around in a tornado. I guess this can be looked at as a good thing though because it means that I am aware of at least some of what is going on inside of me with my thoughts and emotions. Being aware of it means that I can do something about it!

Short post tonight but there will be more tomorrow….that’s a promise to myself.

Make every day a new beginning. No not worry about what you didn't do yesterday, there's nothing you can do to change it. Begin again fresh each day with no regrets.

A Lesson in Anger

Monday, January 02, 2012

Positive thought of the day: 

I treat others the way I wish to be treated.  (from Louise L. Hay)

So this morning I tried out my first day with my new morning routine. Well, it would work better if I actually got up when I said I was going to. The alarm went off and I got up and reset it for an hour later and went back to bed.  Bad, bad , bad. Well, I laid there in bed having an internal fight with myself that I really should not be back in bed and should be doing my routine but then the other me would say but I don’t want to be awake yet. Well, I was back out of bed in 20 minutes! I didn’t do the 5 minutes of meditation or the 10 minutes of stretching or exercise that I had planned but I did manage to get everything else on my routine done. I even had some breakfast. Yay me!

After my shower and getting dressed I came down stairs and let the dog out. While he was out, I posted the positive thought of the day to my Facebook status. I was feeling pretty good about things until I had to go out and save the dog from the monster pine tree in the back yard. He had managed to get himself tangled up in some low branches. I had to go out in the cold and the dark and rescue him. I was sputtering about it until all of a sudden on the way back to the house I thought about the positive thought of the day. Treating others the way I wish to be treated doesn’t stop at just other human beings. Turbo, our dog, needed me and I got upset about it because I had to go out in the cold and dark to get him. I wouldn’t want someone to get upset with me if I need them for something. There have been times in the not so distant past that I was in need of a friend and reached out to someone that just brushed me aside even after I voiced several times that I needed a friend. It really hurt. I ended up being glad that I was able to help Turbo get out of the tree and back inside where it was warm so he could eat his breakfast too.

I drove to work feeling much better about myself than I had when I woke up. I cranked the music and sang with all my heart!

Work was pretty good today. I was starting to stress a bit at times but was able to manage to calm down. My day went from pretty good to completely awesome when an unexpected someone noticed my hair cut right away. It really made my day and I made sure to thank the person too! I drove home on cloud 9.  Hehe

My three MITs (most important tasks) for today were:

1. Work at least 15 minutes on the kitchen/dishes

2. Work on a before bed routine

3. School work (new class started today)

At this time, 8:48pm, I have the before bed routine figured out and have worked on school work and delegated the 15 minutes in the kitchen to my son.

The Daily challenge today on www.meyouhealth.com was: Strengthen core muscles with 5 bridge stretches. I did this after having to fight off the dog. He took the opportunity of me being on the floor to smoother me with kisses. I laughed so hard.

My Before Bed – Saturday thru Wednesday

Get my lunch together for the next day

Get my clothes out for the next day

Brush teeth

Moisturize

Clean cat box

Let the dog out

Swish & Swipe *

*swish & swipe is a FlyLady thing. You do a quick swish of the toilet bowl with the brush and swipe down the outside of the bowl, the bathroom sink and the mirror.

My three MITs for tomorrow:

1. Spend at least 15 minutes working in the kitchen

2. Schoolwork

3. Get the Christmas decorations down and put away

January Mantra:

I am open and receptive to all the good in the Universe. (from Louise L. Hay 2012 calendar You Can Heal Your Life.)

Quotes for the day:

Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to any on which it is poured.  ~Mark Twain

Anger, if not restrained, is frequently more hurtful to us than the injury that provokes it.  ~Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Be not angry that you cannot make others as you wish them to be, since you cannot make yourself as you wish to be.   ~Thomas Kempis

For every minute you remain angry, you give up sixty seconds of peace of mind.  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it as someone else; you are the one who gets burned.  ~Buddha